I want to admit something and be completely real with you: for all of my life, I have suffered from hangriness.
This means that if I don’t have solid food in my system, I will cry or get really angry or get really irrational. I learned this at a very, very early age.
I’ll give you an example. A couple years ago, I was just hanging out with my best friend Kels. And while we were together, I hadn’t had much food at all. And I had quit volleyball within the last year, but it was not the time to talk about it. All of a sudden, when we got back home (we were probably at the mall, let’s be real), I just started bawling my eyes out about volleyball. Were we at a volleyball game? No. Were we talking about volleyball at all before the tears rolled in? Not at all. This is the power of hangriness.
But because Kels is the bestest friend ever, she looked at me with one simple sentence while I was moping at the kitchen table: “You need food.”
So she bolted to my pantry to look for a granola bar and ran it over to me like it was an emergency. And with each chew and swallow, I was slowly becoming myself again. I think we still laugh about this incident to this day.
It’s kind of like Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. When you’re hungry, it’s like you’re a completely different human being. Kels actually gave me a name for my alter-ago. We call her Amber, and no offense to anyone who is named Amber. It’s a lovely name. But we had to name this strange person that comes out of the woodwork and ruins everything in her path when she hasn’t had anything to eat.
So girls, I want you to be real with yourselves. If you have this horrible condition (I’m joking, but furreal), you gotta save your friends and family the pain and get a handle on it. If you haven’t figured out how to cope with this issue, I’ve come up with some ways that have helped me in the past and can continue to help in the future.
So calling all hangries, stay alert. And get yourself some food while you’re reading this because I don’t want you to take this the wrong way.
1. Always have food on you
This past Spring Break, my friends and I all hit the grocery store. We had the option to grab some personal items, and while girls were stocking up on mac and cheese and salad, I was running for the granola bar aisle.
I mean, running.
Where are the granola bars? Excuse me, sir, do you know where the granola bar section is?
My friends rolled their eyes at me, and yes, they probably think I’m crazy. But I firmly loved them enough to the point where I didn’t want to put them through hangry Ashley. Hangry Ashley is not your friend (or Amber, if we put it that way).
If you’re wondering what a good granola brand is, look no further than Nature Valley Granola Bars. These are a god-sent, and they have thankfully kept me from hurting the people I love (and content on Spring Break).
2. Breakfast Is Your Friend
You can never forget about breakfast. You have to be loyal to breakfast. Breakfast shall not be missed (11th commandment for hangries).
I swear if I ever missed breakfast, it would be like World War 3. If I miss my alarm and don’t have time to eat anything in the morning, I will be even later if that means I will eat my breakfast. You see, you can make up for being late, but if you don’t have breakfast one day, you’ll probably lose all your friends and lash out on strangers in your class. The last option seems a little more worse-off.
So if you’re a college student and don’t have time to make omelets every morning, I will introduce you to your new bestie:
or Yoplait Mix ins.
These are a must, friends. When I am tired of the Chobani’s, I’ll move to the Yoplait, and vice versa. These yogurts both hold additional nuts and other ingredients to fill you up even more. Along with this, yogurt contains protein, which is a must for hangries. In fact, the Today Show writes about the connection between protein and feeling full.
“Protein boosts fullness through an action on the brain. There are many two-way nerve signals between the digestive track and brain. When eaten, nerve signals from the stomach send a message boosting fullness. When protein foods are in your stomach, your brain gets the signal that increases your biological fullness. “
So stick to yogurt in the morning, or anything with a good amount of protein.
3. When you feel the hangry-wave coming in, don’t. speak.
This is crucial. There will be mornings when you won’t be able to have a protein-rich breakfast, and there will certainly be times when you won’t have a granola bar to hold you over. And in these moments, you might be asked questions. Someone might want to have a conversation with you.
But trust me, don’t do it. Bad idea.
You might want to ask something super sweet, but it will come out like you actually hate their guts. You might want to join a conversation a few of your friends are having, but it will actually seem like you disagree with everyone there and are making a point to say it.
I’ve done this in long car rides with my family. I will have not eaten in a few hours, and they wonder why I’m not talking. They ask, “What’s wrong?”
And I just sit there and let them come to a conclusion on their own. Little do they know I am saving them some serious wrath.
My family has forgotten about those quiet road trips, but would they forget if I lashed out on them with things I didn’t really mean? Probably not.
So friends, let’s not have this be a reality.
We are better than this, and we can beat the stigma. We can control ourselves, one granola bar at a time.
